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Glee Amazing Race: Tenth Leg - Departure from Busan
True story: as noted in the previous leg, precedent said they were either heading to Alaska or Hawaii next. In the planning stages I messaged a friend—without giving him any context whatsoever as to what I was doing—and demanded "HAWAII OR ALASKA?"
"What?"
"HAWAII OR ALASKA PICK ONE RIGHT NOW."
And that is why they are headed for Alaska.
Last time, on The Amazing Race: Glee: Shipping crates are not giant legos, people look hilarious when they don't know how to ice skate, little kids are ruthless until a couple of hours have passed, Santana's revenge failed to completely materialize, and Kurt is getting a wee bit obsessed.
Holly's Voiceover
"As teams gear up for their last elimination leg before the final stretch to the finish line, it doesn't really matter when they leave the hotel. There is exactly one departure time for where they're going, one arrival time in the destination town, and a whole lot of waiting in-between. We went ahead and booked them all the way there because of that, which the teams are about to discover."
Team Inevitable Family Team
Burt raises his eyebrows at the note that tickets have already been purchased for them. Kurt makes a pained little noise, for airport wrangling is one of the areas in which you can show your skills and add drama to the show! His chances for good television are being undercut! He'll just have to work harder, then, in... "Ketchikan, Alaska," Kurt reads. Alaska! He knew it.
"I want you to be careful, okay?" Burt says as they head for the airport. He's in a tricky spot. Kurt's pushed himself way too far a few times on the race, yeah, but he remembers needing to be helped off the field in high school. He remembers getting hit so hard during a junior varsity game that he missed the rest of the season in a cast. Now he realizes how much he must have made his parents worry, but he understands pushing yourself to win. He's just worried that Kurt doesn't want to win, and has instead put his sights on something that Burt can't even figure out.
(Oh, for the characters to be able to read the commentary of the omniscient narrator. Spoiler, Burt: your son wants to either be the ultimate champion or to dramatically injure himself, and he really doesn't care which.)
"Ketchikan. Does that oil pipeline go there?" Kurt wonders. That can explode, right?
All Teams
As there's plenty of time to kill in the airport, the Humdel teams naturally gravitate to each other. Shannon gets along well with Emma, and after it quickly becomes apparent that Finn and Carole don't particularly want to be around Quinn, she excuses herself and says she'll go eat lunch with her work colleague while the others congregate.
At one table: Shannon Beiste, Emma Pillsbury, and Quinn Fabray. It is an odd combination, but they all seem to be getting along. Quinn and The Panther both understand being driven to lead your team or squad to victory, Shannon and Emma both care about running a fair race where everyone gets along, and Quinn and Emma have their... bizarre relationship that's developed over the course of the competition. It's nice. It's pleasant.
At the other table: "Don't tell them what that cruise is," Kurt whispers to Burt and Carole. "This is going to be hilarious."
Burt looks uncertain. Carole shakes her head at him to indicate that he shouldn't say a word, and privately agrees that Kurt's right. This will be hilarious.
Finn and Puck miss that exchange in favor of eating. Both stab a piece of grilled, marinated beef with their forks—chopsticks are hard and pointless—and shove it directly into their mouths. They ignore Carole pointing out that the lettuce on the side is probably meant to be used as a wrap. Why would they wrap delicious meat in green stuff when they can have delicious meat on its own, untainted by green stuff?
The teams eventually make their way to the gate after a long time spent waiting and get on a short flight to Beijing... where they have another layover. A layover of more than sixteen hours. Yep, the show sure is taking advantage of the contract loophole that says they can make them spend incredible amounts of time in airports without needing to be concerned about finding another luxury hotel. Finn and Puck don't mind, nor does Shannon. There are some delicious restaurants in that airport. Burt would agree with them, but Kurt keeps giving him That Look whenever he focuses too much on food.
Quinn and Emma trade off napping in chairs; they don't trust falling entirely asleep, even with their cameramen there. Finn and Puck pass out at a gate and snore. So do Shannon and Carole. Burt keeps telling Kurt to get some sleep, and Kurt promises him he will; then, once Burt falls asleep, he proceeds to make more plans.
After a long flight to Seattle, they're then faced with yet another layover and yet another flight before they finally land in Ketchikan. It's nearly a day and a half since they left Busan. Though they're all invigorated some minor amount by seeing English everywhere and the American flag upon exiting customs, the race isn't over yet. It's a cool, pleasant, and beautiful afternoon in Ketchikan...
...but once they find the marked cars in the parking lot, they still have to decide what to do for the next Detour.
Detour
Holly walks onscreen.
She's dressed as Sarah Palin.
Just nod and smile at this point.
"Teams must first take a ferry from the airport to the mainland, because that Bridge to Nowhere went nowhere, doncha know." Oh, stop it, Holly. "They'll then chose between Land and Sea."
Cut to a shot of a mountain trail. At first it's a controlled walk with stairs and pavers, but it soon turns into a more traditional trail through the woods.
(Giving a lot of detail to help you predict behaviors, since it's down to so few teams and one spot up or down makes a huge difference.)
"In Land, teams must go for a hike through the wilderness surrounding Ketchikan in search of some wooden boxes we've left by the trails." They show a shot of one of those boxes: made of red cedar and marked with a small red-and-yellow flag, they're pretty hard to miss once you get close. You probably can't see them from a distance through the trees, true, but you're unlikely to miss them once you're there. "Inside these boxes are five small stone figures: an eagle, salmon, bear, wolf, and orca. Teams must collect all five figures and bring them to a worker back at the start of the trail to receive their next clue. Some of the terrain is pretty steep, and if teams get turned around on the trails then they will both waste time and tire themselves out. But if they keep their heads about them and set a safe pace, they might be able to finish in as little as three miles of walking." Beat. "If they get lost, well, it'll be longer." One of their test teams finished in twenty short little minutes. Another got completely lost and exited the woods after two hours.
With the possibly-faster-but-also-possibly-longer Detour described, Holly goes for the more predictable one in the middle. "In Sea, teams will go to the harbor in Ketchikan and choose one of the fishing boats docked there. They'll leave with the teams on them and travel roughly fifteen minutes out into the water."
"Once they've reached their destination, teams will help the crew with a variety of tasks common to a fishing boat. They'll bait a line and lay it into the water, drop a net, and—with pulleys, but by hand—haul up one full of fish. Once those live fish are squirming all around their feet on the deck, they'll head back into town and be given their clue at the dock." And there's the second task: extremely physically grueling for the last step, pretty gross at all stages, with all the (very real) risks of a fishing boat, and with a minimum completion time longer than the other task's. But they will not get lost, are not responsible for finding their own way at any stage, and don't run the risk of turning things into a much longer task than it needs to be.
Team Inevitable Family Team
Burt's the one given the clue-reading shot this time as all the teams reach their cars in the parking lot. His eyes light up at the fishing boat task description (which, of course, editorializes much less than I did). A fishing boat? In Alaska? That's like Deadliest Catch!
Then he looks at Kurt, who's reading a book he picked up in the airport (Look Out! All The Things In Alaska That Want To Hurt You) and hesitates.
Deadliest Catch is kind of, um... deadly.
Timeline Reminder
Teams are effectively tied. They're presented in the poll below in the order of their arrival at the Pit Stop.
There is a special poll question today. This possibility has been set up for a while, people have discussed it in the comments, and it's the last real possible leg to have any sort of decent implementation. But I need to ask this at the start of the leg rather than have it be a natural outcome of the vote, as a "yes" will affect my writeup pretty severely. Namely: does Team Inevitable Family Team go out in a blaze of glory not necessarily related to natural task performance, as Kurt's been gunning for?
If you vote "yes" on this, then it does decide who is eliminated this leg right at the start of things; however, you of course will vote for the 1-2-3 placements for the remaining three teams. If you vote "no" on this, it doesn't mean they can't be eliminated; they can still be the natural last-place finishers on checking in to the Pit Stop. This is all about setting up a unique situation that would affect their ability to even participate the next two votes, however. So! Early, weird elimination vote.
[Poll #1760078]
"What?"
"HAWAII OR ALASKA PICK ONE RIGHT NOW."
And that is why they are headed for Alaska.
Last time, on The Amazing Race: Glee: Shipping crates are not giant legos, people look hilarious when they don't know how to ice skate, little kids are ruthless until a couple of hours have passed, Santana's revenge failed to completely materialize, and Kurt is getting a wee bit obsessed.
Holly's Voiceover
"As teams gear up for their last elimination leg before the final stretch to the finish line, it doesn't really matter when they leave the hotel. There is exactly one departure time for where they're going, one arrival time in the destination town, and a whole lot of waiting in-between. We went ahead and booked them all the way there because of that, which the teams are about to discover."
Team Inevitable Family Team
Burt raises his eyebrows at the note that tickets have already been purchased for them. Kurt makes a pained little noise, for airport wrangling is one of the areas in which you can show your skills and add drama to the show! His chances for good television are being undercut! He'll just have to work harder, then, in... "Ketchikan, Alaska," Kurt reads. Alaska! He knew it.
"I want you to be careful, okay?" Burt says as they head for the airport. He's in a tricky spot. Kurt's pushed himself way too far a few times on the race, yeah, but he remembers needing to be helped off the field in high school. He remembers getting hit so hard during a junior varsity game that he missed the rest of the season in a cast. Now he realizes how much he must have made his parents worry, but he understands pushing yourself to win. He's just worried that Kurt doesn't want to win, and has instead put his sights on something that Burt can't even figure out.
(Oh, for the characters to be able to read the commentary of the omniscient narrator. Spoiler, Burt: your son wants to either be the ultimate champion or to dramatically injure himself, and he really doesn't care which.)
"Ketchikan. Does that oil pipeline go there?" Kurt wonders. That can explode, right?
All Teams
As there's plenty of time to kill in the airport, the Humdel teams naturally gravitate to each other. Shannon gets along well with Emma, and after it quickly becomes apparent that Finn and Carole don't particularly want to be around Quinn, she excuses herself and says she'll go eat lunch with her work colleague while the others congregate.
At one table: Shannon Beiste, Emma Pillsbury, and Quinn Fabray. It is an odd combination, but they all seem to be getting along. Quinn and The Panther both understand being driven to lead your team or squad to victory, Shannon and Emma both care about running a fair race where everyone gets along, and Quinn and Emma have their... bizarre relationship that's developed over the course of the competition. It's nice. It's pleasant.
At the other table: "Don't tell them what that cruise is," Kurt whispers to Burt and Carole. "This is going to be hilarious."
Burt looks uncertain. Carole shakes her head at him to indicate that he shouldn't say a word, and privately agrees that Kurt's right. This will be hilarious.
Finn and Puck miss that exchange in favor of eating. Both stab a piece of grilled, marinated beef with their forks—chopsticks are hard and pointless—and shove it directly into their mouths. They ignore Carole pointing out that the lettuce on the side is probably meant to be used as a wrap. Why would they wrap delicious meat in green stuff when they can have delicious meat on its own, untainted by green stuff?
The teams eventually make their way to the gate after a long time spent waiting and get on a short flight to Beijing... where they have another layover. A layover of more than sixteen hours. Yep, the show sure is taking advantage of the contract loophole that says they can make them spend incredible amounts of time in airports without needing to be concerned about finding another luxury hotel. Finn and Puck don't mind, nor does Shannon. There are some delicious restaurants in that airport. Burt would agree with them, but Kurt keeps giving him That Look whenever he focuses too much on food.
Quinn and Emma trade off napping in chairs; they don't trust falling entirely asleep, even with their cameramen there. Finn and Puck pass out at a gate and snore. So do Shannon and Carole. Burt keeps telling Kurt to get some sleep, and Kurt promises him he will; then, once Burt falls asleep, he proceeds to make more plans.
After a long flight to Seattle, they're then faced with yet another layover and yet another flight before they finally land in Ketchikan. It's nearly a day and a half since they left Busan. Though they're all invigorated some minor amount by seeing English everywhere and the American flag upon exiting customs, the race isn't over yet. It's a cool, pleasant, and beautiful afternoon in Ketchikan...
...but once they find the marked cars in the parking lot, they still have to decide what to do for the next Detour.
Detour
Holly walks onscreen.
She's dressed as Sarah Palin.
Just nod and smile at this point.
"Teams must first take a ferry from the airport to the mainland, because that Bridge to Nowhere went nowhere, doncha know." Oh, stop it, Holly. "They'll then chose between Land and Sea."
Cut to a shot of a mountain trail. At first it's a controlled walk with stairs and pavers, but it soon turns into a more traditional trail through the woods.
(Giving a lot of detail to help you predict behaviors, since it's down to so few teams and one spot up or down makes a huge difference.)
"In Land, teams must go for a hike through the wilderness surrounding Ketchikan in search of some wooden boxes we've left by the trails." They show a shot of one of those boxes: made of red cedar and marked with a small red-and-yellow flag, they're pretty hard to miss once you get close. You probably can't see them from a distance through the trees, true, but you're unlikely to miss them once you're there. "Inside these boxes are five small stone figures: an eagle, salmon, bear, wolf, and orca. Teams must collect all five figures and bring them to a worker back at the start of the trail to receive their next clue. Some of the terrain is pretty steep, and if teams get turned around on the trails then they will both waste time and tire themselves out. But if they keep their heads about them and set a safe pace, they might be able to finish in as little as three miles of walking." Beat. "If they get lost, well, it'll be longer." One of their test teams finished in twenty short little minutes. Another got completely lost and exited the woods after two hours.
With the possibly-faster-but-also-possibly-longer Detour described, Holly goes for the more predictable one in the middle. "In Sea, teams will go to the harbor in Ketchikan and choose one of the fishing boats docked there. They'll leave with the teams on them and travel roughly fifteen minutes out into the water."
"Once they've reached their destination, teams will help the crew with a variety of tasks common to a fishing boat. They'll bait a line and lay it into the water, drop a net, and—with pulleys, but by hand—haul up one full of fish. Once those live fish are squirming all around their feet on the deck, they'll head back into town and be given their clue at the dock." And there's the second task: extremely physically grueling for the last step, pretty gross at all stages, with all the (very real) risks of a fishing boat, and with a minimum completion time longer than the other task's. But they will not get lost, are not responsible for finding their own way at any stage, and don't run the risk of turning things into a much longer task than it needs to be.
Team Inevitable Family Team
Burt's the one given the clue-reading shot this time as all the teams reach their cars in the parking lot. His eyes light up at the fishing boat task description (which, of course, editorializes much less than I did). A fishing boat? In Alaska? That's like Deadliest Catch!
Then he looks at Kurt, who's reading a book he picked up in the airport (Look Out! All The Things In Alaska That Want To Hurt You) and hesitates.
Deadliest Catch is kind of, um... deadly.
Timeline Reminder
Teams are effectively tied. They're presented in the poll below in the order of their arrival at the Pit Stop.
There is a special poll question today. This possibility has been set up for a while, people have discussed it in the comments, and it's the last real possible leg to have any sort of decent implementation. But I need to ask this at the start of the leg rather than have it be a natural outcome of the vote, as a "yes" will affect my writeup pretty severely. Namely: does Team Inevitable Family Team go out in a blaze of glory not necessarily related to natural task performance, as Kurt's been gunning for?
If you vote "yes" on this, then it does decide who is eliminated this leg right at the start of things; however, you of course will vote for the 1-2-3 placements for the remaining three teams. If you vote "no" on this, it doesn't mean they can't be eliminated; they can still be the natural last-place finishers on checking in to the Pit Stop. This is all about setting up a unique situation that would affect their ability to even participate the next two votes, however. So! Early, weird elimination vote.
[Poll #1760078]
no subject
And I voted for Team Inevitable Family Team to take the Sea option because while Burt realises the inherent dangers of Kurt on that fishing boat, I'm sure he will al so realise there are a lot of 'things that want to hurt you' on land. And Kurt is liable to wander off in search of them... At least on the boat there's only so far he can go, and there's more eyes around from experienced crew that doesn't want accidents to happen on their boat because it will screw with their livelyhood.
no subject
no subject
no subject
...Now I want them to fail and Kurt to be an awesome fisherman...
...Oh no. If anyone is going to fall in, it's Finn. Kurt's face...
no subject
Kurt's eyes sparkle with all the horribly dramatic things that could happen on a boat. And then by the end of the 15 minute boat ride out there he's feeling sea sick. Puking does not qualify as a blaze of glory. Neither do feeble attempts at being dramatic while trying not to puke. Although his pouting and mumbling something about a whale knocking his overboard are vaguely amusing
no subject