Can I just echo the other commenters? FAIL, guys, FAIL. All the significant others just walk out unmasked and start snogging their Awesomes (FAIL Finn) in front of all those reporters?
I'm glad you loosened up the format and allowed the POV to switch up as necessary. I thought it worked well. Being in the van POV when we hear Rachel scream was excellent. That was quite tricky and clever of you, emphasizing that they only had audio, not video, since a blank video screen is impossible to ignore, but a silent channel can be easy to overlook, especially when you're listening to another group as well.
It is the ultimate unfairness to Sam that he's the one that doesn't get powers, but I'm glad he's taking it in such good spirits. I've always seen Sam as a glass-half-full guy.
Obviously, I loved the Klaine. I love that Blaine is the voice of reason now that Kurt is a little more into it, and how he approaches it with more heart where as Kurt brought the cynicism to his early protests. I loved giddy!Kurt showing Blaine his powers. I felt so bad for Blaine when he was on the verge of tears in the van. Something tells me he is not going to be able to handle his boyfriend's superhero life very well.
I appreciated how serious the action got, and yet the chapter still felt stereotypically comic-booky as opposed to really dramatic since it went from the grave combat to everything's perfect high of the attention and reporters (plus even the combat had jokes, like Rachel singing "I Surrender" and Kurt side-eying her, lol). I like this because it feels like this wasn't the big "oh shit" moment, but rather it's setting up for everything to unravel.
The lights, camera, action was just PERFECT Rachel POV. I love how you highlight her very Rachel qualities while at the same time keeping her in the moment and relatable and relating to the other characters.
I'm not super interested in Brittana on the show, I think I'm more Artie/Brittany (what is their ship name, I can't think of any decent way to smush their names together...Brartie?), but I have to say I loved the Brittana in this chapter. The gorgeous way you described Santana blazing elemental and then slowly dimming, and the mountain lion approaching a sunset...gah. Is there some significance to Santana being described as a sunset and her dreaming about Sunset Park? And I love how you grabbed Santana's guilt and internal struggles about her sexuality from the end of season 2 and really developed it throughout this story so far.
"Lauren and Sam seem to be taking it better," Kurt muttered, nodding toward the two. God, how do you do this so perfectly? This is just so Kurt. Whenever he's in a disagreement with someone, he naturally falls into the habit of trying to make the other person feel guilty and draw the focus off of himself. This is just right amount of that that I could see him trying with Blaine. Plus, you worked in the royal hand wave that Colfer has been sneaking in since almost the beginning of season 1!!! You put in so many details like this--they are what make me feel like I'm reading a true Glee fanfiction rather than just mentally associating the characters with a piece of fiction.
As should be no surprise by now, I love your work. There is one little piece of constructive criticism I could possibly offer for this chapter, though, beyond typos. Do you typically like cc? If not, pretend I never said anything!
no subject
I'm glad you loosened up the format and allowed the POV to switch up as necessary. I thought it worked well. Being in the van POV when we hear Rachel scream was excellent. That was quite tricky and clever of you, emphasizing that they only had audio, not video, since a blank video screen is impossible to ignore, but a silent channel can be easy to overlook, especially when you're listening to another group as well.
It is the ultimate unfairness to Sam that he's the one that doesn't get powers, but I'm glad he's taking it in such good spirits. I've always seen Sam as a glass-half-full guy.
Obviously, I loved the Klaine. I love that Blaine is the voice of reason now that Kurt is a little more into it, and how he approaches it with more heart where as Kurt brought the cynicism to his early protests. I loved giddy!Kurt showing Blaine his powers. I felt so bad for Blaine when he was on the verge of tears in the van. Something tells me he is not going to be able to handle his boyfriend's superhero life very well.
I appreciated how serious the action got, and yet the chapter still felt stereotypically comic-booky as opposed to really dramatic since it went from the grave combat to everything's perfect high of the attention and reporters (plus even the combat had jokes, like Rachel singing "I Surrender" and Kurt side-eying her, lol). I like this because it feels like this wasn't the big "oh shit" moment, but rather it's setting up for everything to unravel.
The lights, camera, action was just PERFECT Rachel POV. I love how you highlight her very Rachel qualities while at the same time keeping her in the moment and relatable and relating to the other characters.
I'm not super interested in Brittana on the show, I think I'm more Artie/Brittany (what is their ship name, I can't think of any decent way to smush their names together...Brartie?), but I have to say I loved the Brittana in this chapter. The gorgeous way you described Santana blazing elemental and then slowly dimming, and the mountain lion approaching a sunset...gah. Is there some significance to Santana being described as a sunset and her dreaming about Sunset Park? And I love how you grabbed Santana's guilt and internal struggles about her sexuality from the end of season 2 and really developed it throughout this story so far.
"Lauren and Sam seem to be taking it better," Kurt muttered, nodding toward the two. God, how do you do this so perfectly? This is just so Kurt. Whenever he's in a disagreement with someone, he naturally falls into the habit of trying to make the other person feel guilty and draw the focus off of himself. This is just right amount of that that I could see him trying with Blaine. Plus, you worked in the royal hand wave that Colfer has been sneaking in since almost the beginning of season 1!!! You put in so many details like this--they are what make me feel like I'm reading a true Glee fanfiction rather than just mentally associating the characters with a piece of fiction.
As should be no surprise by now, I love your work. There is one little piece of constructive criticism I could possibly offer for this chapter, though, beyond typos. Do you typically like cc? If not, pretend I never said anything!