http://mymanhas2jobs.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] mymanhas2jobs.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] miggy 2011-10-29 02:32 am (UTC)

I love it. I love it. It gets better every chapter.
One bit of concrit, though, if that's okay:
Her cheeks were flushed and her lips were swollen.
I don't know anyone whose lips swell after they kiss someone. Mine sure don't.
But otherwise, omg, you are so amazing.
(34 comments)

Post a comment in response:

(will be screened)
(will be screened if not validated)
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting

If you are unable to use this captcha for any reason, please contact us by email at support@dreamwidth.org

 
Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.