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Glee Amazing Race: Ninth Leg - Detour
A Brooklynite friend with access to a roof deck is so annoyed that they've moved the big Manhattan fireworks display from the East River to the Hudson in recent years.
Last time, on The Amazing Race: Glee: India is behind them, traded for South Korea. Sadly, there's no repeat of the hilarious moment from Season 4 when severed octopus tentacles attempted to climb off racers' plates.
Team How Did This Happen
Quinn and Emma both bite uncertainly at their lips. Shipping yard: loud and dirty. Department store: loud and crowded. They're faced with a Sophie's Choice right the hell here. "Let's do Shopping," Quinn finally says.
"Are you sure?" Emma asks.
Quinn, who bought every type of Busan map she could think of at the airport, taps one of the subway system. "There's a stop with that store's name, like there's one for this place. We can go straight to it and be sure that we won't get lost; it's just efficient." She nods to herself. She's just being efficient. She's just going to win.
"Okay," Emma agrees when she's sure that Quinn is up for it, and they head off in search of the nearby subway station.
Teams Inevitable Family Team and PTC Worst of the Week
It's an easy decision for Santana and Brittany to go for Shopping. They are good at shopping and convincing other people to do work for them. They are not good with heavy machinery. They nearly head for a cab, but hear Quinn psyching herself up to take the subway over to the store and follow them there.
It's not such a clear-cut decision for the Hummels. On the one hand, neither of them has the slightest issue with machinery, they're used to figuring out how to work with new equipment, and Shipping seems pretty straightforward compared to the three-part task inside a crowded store. On the other hand, Kurt likes shopping. On the... third hand, Burt is already complaining about two-thirds of that task. He likes heavy machinery like Kurt likes shopping, and he is pretty sure he doesn't trust a lot of what they'll have to do there. On the, um, fourth hand, Kurt likes shopping but is also aware that there is far more potential for a dramatic accident to happen with the shipping crates. Assuming that's possible, though; there might be safety regulations. Maybe that's not a sure bet.
"Come on," they overhear Santana say to Brittany as they take off. "Quinn just said we can take the subway straight there."
Well, if he can't guarantee good TV right at the moment then the most important thing is to stay in the race. Kurt raises his eyebrow at Burt, who sighs and relents. There's definitely something to be said about an option that presents little to no chance of getting lost, and even if they have to spend their own money at the store, the far cheaper subway fare will balance it.
All three teams wind up on the same train. Fortunately for Quinn, going by the previous Korean subway experiences on the show, this non-rush hour train is well-used but certainly not filled to the brim with passengers. It's clean, quiet, fast, and it's an easy transfer to the next subway line when they have to make that change. Soon all three teams are coming up out of the subway station, seeing the massive store in front of them, and taking it head-on after deep, centering breaths.
Teams PTA and Dudebro
Carole would actually prefer Shopping. Shannon has no problems with it; she knows she'd look ridiculous ice skating, but she can just cling to the outside wall and pull herself along. That's not the issue: they're just both convinced that Shipping will be a lot faster. It's simpler than trying to locate three items inside a giant store, they can make constant progress on one task, and it's closer.
Puck and Finn had a much simpler take on it: big cranes and metal blocks are awesome, and the world's biggest department store is not.
They all head for cabs and soon discover what the other three teams were worried about: traveling by the surface eats up a ton of time, and the distance advantage they have is quickly eaten up by stop-and-start traffic. They eventually make it to the shipping yard and run inside. Finn automatically looks around for his mom, but to his surprise she's taken off in hunt of the marked spot. Carole wants Finn to do well, of course, but she also realizes that 1) they are down to five teams, three of which include members of their family and 2) the other members of that family were the ones who got featured on Survivor and it's time for her to kick a little ass.
Not that she doesn't love Finn, of course. But if need be, she will totally blow past him to the mat and then order pizza to make it up to him.
As there's no obvious advantage to either, Carole and Shannon rock-paper-scissors it to determine who goes first. Carole thus heads up the ladder first, gripping it so tightly that her knuckles turn white, and is safely ensconced in the cab by the time Puck and Finn finally find where they're going to go.
Summary version of what happens next: Carole gets initially frustrated at the controls and takes a while to calm down, but is then able to focus. Shannon yells up encouraging words about just needing to move that crate as smoothly as dropping an egg between two baskets. Puck keeps shouting that Finn needs to hurry up, because he wants to do the crane thing, too. And Finn...
Finn, faced with an incredible spectrum of identical shipping crates in a dozen different colors, is picturing legos.
It's not a good thing when Finn Hudson gets distracted.
Team How Did This Happen
By staying near the walls and looking at the high, well-lit ceilings, Quinn is actually able to focus successfully on the space around her rather than the crowds. She knows she's pushing herself, but at the same time it's working. It probably wouldn't have worked without so much space overhead, but it is working.
"I watched them prepare this noodle dish," Emma says as she carries it back to their table. She seems satisfied with the gleaming stainless steel kitchen and controlled, sure movements that the cooks displayed. It's not something that would have assured her the year before, but on that day she was able to watch a background employee cleaning a currently-unused counter with some local Lysol equivalent and be convinced.
Quinn takes a second to focus back on Emma, and when she does Emma is smiling. "I think we're still doing pretty good, don't you?" she asks as she hands Quinn a fork. "Here, I got another cup so we can split it up."
"We are," Quinn says with amused disbelief. Weren't they the random pairing that no one expected to go very far? "Well, let's eat."
Team Inevitable Family Team
"We should have done the cranes," Burt mutters to himself as he pulls himself along the ice rink walls. The camera crew dutifully records this hilarious footage.
Behind him, Kurt attempts to glide elegantly by. He assumes that, given his general agility, he will be able to put on a show for the cameras that contrasts nicely with his father's fumbling. Perhaps he would if he'd ever strapped on a pair of skates before that day. Instead of that plan, the cameras instead record two hilarious bouts of fumbling. Kurt also falls more than once.
Oh well: it still makes for good TV.
Team PTC Worst of the Week
While the girls' camera crew is just as dutiful as the Hummels', they're still not sure how Santana and Brittany managed to get half a dozen cute Korean boys leading them around the mall. They tried. It was just... magic, apparently.
Santana reaches and and adjusts her breasts, and then suggests to Brittany that she tug down her neckline again to show off her cleavage more.
Oh. That probably had something to do with it.
Team Inevitable Family Team
Unexpectedly, it's not Kurt's bizarre organizational skills or shopping knowledge that gets them through the Detour first: it's Burt's increasing panic over being stuck in this seemingly endless store. He pulls himself around that rink with all the effort of moving heavy bus seats in Chennai. He sucks down the noodle dish before Kurt's had more than a couple of bites. And his "point and buy it, it looks like it might vaguely fit" clothing philosophy actually works well for him when he happens to point at an kitschy, tourist-driven hole in the wall. Sure enough, that tiny place has t-shirts with the needed names, and soon they're headed to the named entrance on their instructions to check in and be given their next clue.
Kurt looks confused.
Did his dad just beat him at consumerism?
Team PTA
By the time Finn finally gets controls of the crane and stops making noises like he's a Transformer, Carole has already been replaced in the cab by Shannon. Puck looks highly irritated when he takes Finn's place, and Finn looks a little sheepish when he realizes his mom totally beat him on that task.
Carole smirks a little at him, and then yells up to her partner, "Just remember to keep calm! Like you're... uh... laying down in the grass for a nap?" From inside the cab, Shannon shoots her a weird look. That's not relaxing at all. Ants would be all over you. What a weird analogy.
Puck tries to focus on the task, but he gets frustrated at the controls and lets his temper take over. He pictures legos, too.
With only a minor flash of guilt, Carole leaves behind Finn at the cranes while her son looks after her with a faintly betrayed expression. It's a game, sweetie! And it's near the finish line.
Team How Did This Happen
Emma Pillsbury and Quinn Fabray face down huge crowds full of strangers, and still come out as team number three. They are efficient, supportive, and nothing like the random pairing they started as at the beginning.
Seriously, how did this happen?
Team PTC Worst of the Week
You know, helpful locals tend to contribute more toward the ultimate goal of coming in first when teams don't constantly flirt with them to keep them under their control. Santana and Brittany might be overplaying their hand a bit; they're both hot, and those boys would have helped them out whether or not they constantly leaned forward.
Yes, they get the boys to show them just where to go, but between needing to maneuver a large group of hangers-on through the store and taking time to corral them all together, they wind up as the last of the Shopping teams and team four overall. (And were tied with Dudebro in the votes; only their previous placement saved them.)
Of course, as they have no idea where the other teams are, they are not aware of the fact that they're very nearly in last place. Yet.
Team Dudebro
Puck and Finn aren't too worried when they finally finish. They're convinced that this task had to be faster than Shopping. Sure, they took a ton of times to grab onto their crates, and both of them agreed that they were picturing these totally amazing fortresses they built out of tiny plastic bricks, and maybe both of those big, strong jocks were silently scared out of their minds when they climbed up that tiny ladder... whatever. They're still fine. They get approval from the worker and are handed their next clue. "Roadblock," Puck reads.
Like Puck Said
Holly perches on the edge of a desk in a... business center? Computer lab? "South Korea has a famously modern telecommunications infrastructure," she says. "Do you know how much we pay for total crap service in America? I am never going to be satisfied with the streaming I get from Netflix again, let me tell you."
There's a short pause as someone offscreen tells her something.
"Oh. Netflix advertises with us? Really?" Holly smiles and shrugs at the camera. "Forget what I just said! Go stream Next Generation and do a drinking game where you take a shot every time Patrick Stewart is sexy." She leans in and winks. "Gonna spoil you a little: you get drunk fast."
She hops up and reveals that she seems to be in an apartment building; through a window you can see what looks like a residential setting outside. "Teams will make their way by cab to this address in central Busan. Once there they'll find this room, a computer lab for residents on the ground floor. They'll then play a simple little match of what's become such a popular game in this country that there are professional teams making six-figure incomes over it: StarCraft. Well, StarCraft II. All they have to do is play one short little five-minute scenario against a local gamer and win it, and they'll be given their next clue. They can try as many times as they like."
The camera pans over to the right to show those local gamers: elementary-age children.
The camera pans back to Holly, who grins. "Think whatever you want: it's going to be a lot harder than they expect. We're talking about something that's serious business here."
(Just to clarify: the racers get to play in English, and the locals get to play in Korean. It'll just impact what they see on their own screens.)
Team Dudebro
On the way to join the other teams at the address in the clue, Dudebro considers the teaser hint provided to them to make their decision: "Who's ready to defend the universe?"
This game is getting weird.
(Side note: if you're unfamiliar with real-time strategy games, do a quick readthrough before you vote. They're very different from platformers or first-person shooters, etc. It'll require a combination of quick reactions, foresight, basic video game skills, and—obviously—strategy.)
[Poll #1759102]
Last time, on The Amazing Race: Glee: India is behind them, traded for South Korea. Sadly, there's no repeat of the hilarious moment from Season 4 when severed octopus tentacles attempted to climb off racers' plates.
Team How Did This Happen
Quinn and Emma both bite uncertainly at their lips. Shipping yard: loud and dirty. Department store: loud and crowded. They're faced with a Sophie's Choice right the hell here. "Let's do Shopping," Quinn finally says.
"Are you sure?" Emma asks.
Quinn, who bought every type of Busan map she could think of at the airport, taps one of the subway system. "There's a stop with that store's name, like there's one for this place. We can go straight to it and be sure that we won't get lost; it's just efficient." She nods to herself. She's just being efficient. She's just going to win.
"Okay," Emma agrees when she's sure that Quinn is up for it, and they head off in search of the nearby subway station.
Teams Inevitable Family Team and PTC Worst of the Week
It's an easy decision for Santana and Brittany to go for Shopping. They are good at shopping and convincing other people to do work for them. They are not good with heavy machinery. They nearly head for a cab, but hear Quinn psyching herself up to take the subway over to the store and follow them there.
It's not such a clear-cut decision for the Hummels. On the one hand, neither of them has the slightest issue with machinery, they're used to figuring out how to work with new equipment, and Shipping seems pretty straightforward compared to the three-part task inside a crowded store. On the other hand, Kurt likes shopping. On the... third hand, Burt is already complaining about two-thirds of that task. He likes heavy machinery like Kurt likes shopping, and he is pretty sure he doesn't trust a lot of what they'll have to do there. On the, um, fourth hand, Kurt likes shopping but is also aware that there is far more potential for a dramatic accident to happen with the shipping crates. Assuming that's possible, though; there might be safety regulations. Maybe that's not a sure bet.
"Come on," they overhear Santana say to Brittany as they take off. "Quinn just said we can take the subway straight there."
Well, if he can't guarantee good TV right at the moment then the most important thing is to stay in the race. Kurt raises his eyebrow at Burt, who sighs and relents. There's definitely something to be said about an option that presents little to no chance of getting lost, and even if they have to spend their own money at the store, the far cheaper subway fare will balance it.
All three teams wind up on the same train. Fortunately for Quinn, going by the previous Korean subway experiences on the show, this non-rush hour train is well-used but certainly not filled to the brim with passengers. It's clean, quiet, fast, and it's an easy transfer to the next subway line when they have to make that change. Soon all three teams are coming up out of the subway station, seeing the massive store in front of them, and taking it head-on after deep, centering breaths.
Teams PTA and Dudebro
Carole would actually prefer Shopping. Shannon has no problems with it; she knows she'd look ridiculous ice skating, but she can just cling to the outside wall and pull herself along. That's not the issue: they're just both convinced that Shipping will be a lot faster. It's simpler than trying to locate three items inside a giant store, they can make constant progress on one task, and it's closer.
Puck and Finn had a much simpler take on it: big cranes and metal blocks are awesome, and the world's biggest department store is not.
They all head for cabs and soon discover what the other three teams were worried about: traveling by the surface eats up a ton of time, and the distance advantage they have is quickly eaten up by stop-and-start traffic. They eventually make it to the shipping yard and run inside. Finn automatically looks around for his mom, but to his surprise she's taken off in hunt of the marked spot. Carole wants Finn to do well, of course, but she also realizes that 1) they are down to five teams, three of which include members of their family and 2) the other members of that family were the ones who got featured on Survivor and it's time for her to kick a little ass.
Not that she doesn't love Finn, of course. But if need be, she will totally blow past him to the mat and then order pizza to make it up to him.
As there's no obvious advantage to either, Carole and Shannon rock-paper-scissors it to determine who goes first. Carole thus heads up the ladder first, gripping it so tightly that her knuckles turn white, and is safely ensconced in the cab by the time Puck and Finn finally find where they're going to go.
Summary version of what happens next: Carole gets initially frustrated at the controls and takes a while to calm down, but is then able to focus. Shannon yells up encouraging words about just needing to move that crate as smoothly as dropping an egg between two baskets. Puck keeps shouting that Finn needs to hurry up, because he wants to do the crane thing, too. And Finn...
Finn, faced with an incredible spectrum of identical shipping crates in a dozen different colors, is picturing legos.
It's not a good thing when Finn Hudson gets distracted.
Team How Did This Happen
By staying near the walls and looking at the high, well-lit ceilings, Quinn is actually able to focus successfully on the space around her rather than the crowds. She knows she's pushing herself, but at the same time it's working. It probably wouldn't have worked without so much space overhead, but it is working.
"I watched them prepare this noodle dish," Emma says as she carries it back to their table. She seems satisfied with the gleaming stainless steel kitchen and controlled, sure movements that the cooks displayed. It's not something that would have assured her the year before, but on that day she was able to watch a background employee cleaning a currently-unused counter with some local Lysol equivalent and be convinced.
Quinn takes a second to focus back on Emma, and when she does Emma is smiling. "I think we're still doing pretty good, don't you?" she asks as she hands Quinn a fork. "Here, I got another cup so we can split it up."
"We are," Quinn says with amused disbelief. Weren't they the random pairing that no one expected to go very far? "Well, let's eat."
Team Inevitable Family Team
"We should have done the cranes," Burt mutters to himself as he pulls himself along the ice rink walls. The camera crew dutifully records this hilarious footage.
Behind him, Kurt attempts to glide elegantly by. He assumes that, given his general agility, he will be able to put on a show for the cameras that contrasts nicely with his father's fumbling. Perhaps he would if he'd ever strapped on a pair of skates before that day. Instead of that plan, the cameras instead record two hilarious bouts of fumbling. Kurt also falls more than once.
Oh well: it still makes for good TV.
Team PTC Worst of the Week
While the girls' camera crew is just as dutiful as the Hummels', they're still not sure how Santana and Brittany managed to get half a dozen cute Korean boys leading them around the mall. They tried. It was just... magic, apparently.
Santana reaches and and adjusts her breasts, and then suggests to Brittany that she tug down her neckline again to show off her cleavage more.
Oh. That probably had something to do with it.
Team Inevitable Family Team
Unexpectedly, it's not Kurt's bizarre organizational skills or shopping knowledge that gets them through the Detour first: it's Burt's increasing panic over being stuck in this seemingly endless store. He pulls himself around that rink with all the effort of moving heavy bus seats in Chennai. He sucks down the noodle dish before Kurt's had more than a couple of bites. And his "point and buy it, it looks like it might vaguely fit" clothing philosophy actually works well for him when he happens to point at an kitschy, tourist-driven hole in the wall. Sure enough, that tiny place has t-shirts with the needed names, and soon they're headed to the named entrance on their instructions to check in and be given their next clue.
Kurt looks confused.
Did his dad just beat him at consumerism?
Team PTA
By the time Finn finally gets controls of the crane and stops making noises like he's a Transformer, Carole has already been replaced in the cab by Shannon. Puck looks highly irritated when he takes Finn's place, and Finn looks a little sheepish when he realizes his mom totally beat him on that task.
Carole smirks a little at him, and then yells up to her partner, "Just remember to keep calm! Like you're... uh... laying down in the grass for a nap?" From inside the cab, Shannon shoots her a weird look. That's not relaxing at all. Ants would be all over you. What a weird analogy.
Puck tries to focus on the task, but he gets frustrated at the controls and lets his temper take over. He pictures legos, too.
With only a minor flash of guilt, Carole leaves behind Finn at the cranes while her son looks after her with a faintly betrayed expression. It's a game, sweetie! And it's near the finish line.
Team How Did This Happen
Emma Pillsbury and Quinn Fabray face down huge crowds full of strangers, and still come out as team number three. They are efficient, supportive, and nothing like the random pairing they started as at the beginning.
Seriously, how did this happen?
Team PTC Worst of the Week
You know, helpful locals tend to contribute more toward the ultimate goal of coming in first when teams don't constantly flirt with them to keep them under their control. Santana and Brittany might be overplaying their hand a bit; they're both hot, and those boys would have helped them out whether or not they constantly leaned forward.
Yes, they get the boys to show them just where to go, but between needing to maneuver a large group of hangers-on through the store and taking time to corral them all together, they wind up as the last of the Shopping teams and team four overall. (And were tied with Dudebro in the votes; only their previous placement saved them.)
Of course, as they have no idea where the other teams are, they are not aware of the fact that they're very nearly in last place. Yet.
Team Dudebro
Puck and Finn aren't too worried when they finally finish. They're convinced that this task had to be faster than Shopping. Sure, they took a ton of times to grab onto their crates, and both of them agreed that they were picturing these totally amazing fortresses they built out of tiny plastic bricks, and maybe both of those big, strong jocks were silently scared out of their minds when they climbed up that tiny ladder... whatever. They're still fine. They get approval from the worker and are handed their next clue. "Roadblock," Puck reads.
Like Puck Said
Holly perches on the edge of a desk in a... business center? Computer lab? "South Korea has a famously modern telecommunications infrastructure," she says. "Do you know how much we pay for total crap service in America? I am never going to be satisfied with the streaming I get from Netflix again, let me tell you."
There's a short pause as someone offscreen tells her something.
"Oh. Netflix advertises with us? Really?" Holly smiles and shrugs at the camera. "Forget what I just said! Go stream Next Generation and do a drinking game where you take a shot every time Patrick Stewart is sexy." She leans in and winks. "Gonna spoil you a little: you get drunk fast."
She hops up and reveals that she seems to be in an apartment building; through a window you can see what looks like a residential setting outside. "Teams will make their way by cab to this address in central Busan. Once there they'll find this room, a computer lab for residents on the ground floor. They'll then play a simple little match of what's become such a popular game in this country that there are professional teams making six-figure incomes over it: StarCraft. Well, StarCraft II. All they have to do is play one short little five-minute scenario against a local gamer and win it, and they'll be given their next clue. They can try as many times as they like."
The camera pans over to the right to show those local gamers: elementary-age children.
The camera pans back to Holly, who grins. "Think whatever you want: it's going to be a lot harder than they expect. We're talking about something that's serious business here."
(Just to clarify: the racers get to play in English, and the locals get to play in Korean. It'll just impact what they see on their own screens.)
Team Dudebro
On the way to join the other teams at the address in the clue, Dudebro considers the teaser hint provided to them to make their decision: "Who's ready to defend the universe?"
This game is getting weird.
(Side note: if you're unfamiliar with real-time strategy games, do a quick readthrough before you vote. They're very different from platformers or first-person shooters, etc. It'll require a combination of quick reactions, foresight, basic video game skills, and—obviously—strategy.)
[Poll #1759102]
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I purposefully wanted to have something that would serve as a potential brick wall for every single team.
(Plus, the hilarious image of them getting totally owned by little kids.)
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You know what, I take that back. Here's how I'm voting:
Kurt, Santana, Puck, Shannon and Emma take the roadblocks.
Shannon comes in first. She's a football coach, and a winning one at that, and has strategy coming out of her bum. She's also got good reflexes and can think on her feet. Her video game skills may not be up there with Finn or Puck's, but this isn't a shoot-and-destroy game. She's got this.
Kurt comes in second. He thought "defending the universe" sounded like it had a lot of potential glory. He did not even think of video games. But he's not about to be defeated by a little kid. He learned strategy at the knee of Sue Sylvester. And his reflexes are sharp from out-maneuvering jocks for 11 years. It takes him a minute to get the hang of the game, but he's determined to make this as dramatic as possible.
In third place we have Puck. He and Finn rock-papered-scissored for this one, and good thing Puck won. Finn, although the quarterback, doesn't really have the patience for strategy. Puck gets frustrated, but he's used to playing against little kids (and he stopped letting his little sister win when she was 8, so he has no problem grinding them to dust).
Emma comes in a surprising 4th. She's patient and methodical, and the computer lab is reassuringly free of germs (especially after she sprayed down the computer work station, and doesn't get too close to the little children). She has no video game skills, but she is patient and intelligent enough to learn from her mistakes.
And in last place we have Santana. Being PWNED by little kids was her downfall, and she spends more time insulting them in Spanish than playing the game. Brittany muses that she really should have taken this challenge, because she wins this game against Lord Tubbington all the time. In Korean too.
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I forsee *LOTS* of bleeping from the hypothetical censors as Puck gets his ass handed to him by a bunch of 10 year old Korean kids.
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This is one of those "screw it" moments where it's not a question of success, but of failure. And how badly do people fail.
My thoughts:
Team Inevitable Family Team
Kurt - Recognizing the location and the hint, TIFT goes with Kurt. I'm guessing Kurt will take some time at this, but won't be entirely hopeless. Eventually he'll get through.
Team PTA
Carole - Carole sees what's going and and thinks that living with Finn might give her some skills by osmosis. She wins, eventually, but not before Finn manages to show up.
Team How Did This Happen
Emma - Is there any way this can end well?
Team PTC Worst of the Week
Santana - Santana's pretty decent at gaming, but she's even better at bribery. There's nothing to say she can't bribe a kid to lose for her, right?
Team Dudebro
Puck - The ultimate badass steps up! And while he begins by failing miserably, he eventually falls into the right frame of mind (he plays video games against his sister, and he knows elementary school students can be frightened into submission). Dudebros go back to the top of the pack.
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Brittany takes it and does surprisingly well. Lord Tubbington loves Halo even more than fondue.
Shannon takes it and it takes her a while to learn the controls. She's not a gamer at all, the buttons are everywhere and they're small.
Burt takes it and has the same problems as Shannon. He doesn't have any her strategic mind either so it takes him longer to get the hang of it. Yelling how stupid the coach is at the TV while he sits on his couch doesn't help in video games.
Emma takes it because well, she has to. And first she spends time cleaning the controller and insists on cleaning the kids' controllers too because germs are everywhere kids. Then she starts playing and video games are messy.
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I honestly have no idea, but it is one of the best things in this whole race. They just wound up being so good for each other. You'd almost think one of them was actually some kind of trained counselor or something.
As for the detour, this is amazing. Team Dudebro, your moment has arrived! You may be a little to the back of the pack to appreciate it, though.
I see Burt and Carole taking this one on the grounds that the location reeks of a brains challenge. Kurt thinks he'd possibly be better at it, but there's zero potential for good television in a computer lab. Carole and Burt both use computers at work and think they'll be fine, then find out it's a video game challenge. Burt probably does play video games with Finn sometimes, occasionally, more often than never at least. Looking at who else is doing this, he probably maintains the lead mostly due to everybody else being awful at it except Dudebro.
Carole's lucky they're towards the front and she doesn't fluster easily, but they still drop back to fourth.
Emma's going to be awhile, but at least this is clean and she'll eventually figure it out with her methodical nature. She's in a good head space at this point in the race, bizarrely. I'd say she finishes second due to failing less than the others who have no clue what they're doing. Having a functional partnership helps so much with being calm enough to learn new things!
Brittany in a computer lab? When Santana's done laughing at the idea she takes this one. She's ... not very good at this. Then she gets frustrated. There's multilingual swearing. She's learned some new colorful words along the race from the cute boys they've met. She uses them all. The wind up in last. She hates children so much.
Team Dudebro looks suspicious when they read the clue. Puck takes it after a coin flip. He whoops with victory when he finds out it's a video game. He finishes by far the fastest bringing them up to third place or so.
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Team IFT - "Who's ready to defend the universe?" Really? What does that even mean? Kurt's kind of worried about taking it since it means Burt will automatically have to take the next challenge, even if it's majorly physical. On the other hand, defending the universe kind of sounds physical too. Kurt ends up taking it just because it sounds suitably dramatic and is understandably disappointed. It takes him far too long to figure out how the game even works, but once he does, he's got a fairly good head for strategy (I like to imagine that Sue drills them on battle strategies. Because you never know.) Being a manipulative, scheming bastard might just be a boon here and every time he loses, he just gets more determined and competitive rather than frustrated.
Team PTA - Jigga what? Defending the universe? Well whatever, they're tied. It kind of sounds vaguely physical, let Shannon take it. Shannon's very good at strategy and she actually catches on pretty quick to the game mechanics. They manage to finish first, though Shannon suffers some embarrassing losses first.
Team HdtH - Quinn worries about this task the entire journey to the destination. Defending the universe sounds both difficult and dirty. Quinn's so relieved when she sees the computer lab that she nearly weeps. Emma meticulously cleans the keyboard and mouse, and then they make the discovery that not only does Emma not know how to play video games, she's absolutely awful at strategy.
Team PTC WotW - Santana wouldn't trust Brittany with defending a spot at the table, much less the universe. On the plus side, Santana is pretty good at battle strategy and the art of playing somebody for a fool. On the down side, Santana has never played a video game in her life and is convinced that it's for nerds. She makes so many rude comments, that the kid she's playing against starts getting really, really mean. Santana is losing matches faster than she can even figure out which buttons do what. Brittany calls helpful tips from across the room, but Santana has no idea what she's talking about. What the hell is a zerg rush?
Team Dudebro - Oh god, oh god. They always knew this day would come. They've been called upon to defend the universe from alien invaders! How did the network find universe-destroying aliens just for the purpose of a television show? Man, they're good. Both Finn and Puck are incredibly disappointed when it turns out to be a video game challenge. Or well, they would have been if they weren't both great video game players. They Rochambeau for it and Puck wins (Finn will never learn to stop picking rock first). Puck isn't any good at strategy, but he's got a leg up on all the other competitors by being good at games in general. He doesn't have to waste time figuring out what certain buttons do or what some terms mean. Puck isn't great but he finishes before Emma and Santana and frankly, that's what counts.
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Burt takes this one - he was a master in the arcade when he was a kid. This is a little different (obvs) but he has good reflexes and can plan ahead (owning his own business and all).
Shannon comes in a very close second (like a minute behind because they got there at different times). Like other posters said, she's a coach and has to have all those abilities.
Puck takes it for Team DudeBro and rocks it out very quickly. They leave in third only because they got there so late.
Santana takes it for PTC. At first she spends a lot of time trying to annihilate the opponents, then she clues in, but it takes her some time, as she gets frustrated but eventually perseveres.
Emma is beyond terrible. She can't figure out how to make things happen and is constantly surprised by her opponent's actions. (Here, I see her doing that "ooh" jumpback every time there's an explosion or something). Also she's so methodical, that she can't get enough speed in her play to get ahead. Eventually her kid takes pity on her, and Team HdtH leaves far, far behind the others.
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Team Inevitable Family Team (5): Burt
Given the vague description, Kurt & Burt hmm and haw for a while before Burt takes it. Which doesn't really matter because I think this is a task that both of them would do very, very poorly at. None of the adults on this race have a chance and Kurt would just be... so awful at it. So awful (which is why I'm kind of confused that they're doing so well in the polls). Anyway, I can see this Roadblock having the potential to knock them out of the race. Neither of them have any experience in what they're doing and don't have any backup skills that might help.
Team PTA(3): Shannon
Having no real clue what it is, Shannon takes it. It takes her a long time to figure out how to operate the game, but when she does her strategist mind kicks in. She sees patterns in her opponents movements and adapts. She catches on to the learning curve quickly, but not before a couple teams are able to pass
Team How Did This Happen(2): Emma
Emma's therapist has recommended that she find safe ways to introduce messiness into her life, preferably in a fun setting. She recommended video games to Emma. So Emma bought a copy of Starcraft and experienced the glorious blood, guts, goo and puss of Starcraft from the safety of her living room. And now she kicks ass at it.
Team PTC Worst of the Week(4): Santana
I think it would be hilarious to see Santana's confidence CRUSHED by a little kid. I can see the censors having a field day trying to keep up with her cursing. A computer mouse may also be thrown across the room. Just when she thinks she is about to attack the little brat the air conditioning kicks in and Santana Has A Plan. She puffs her chest out and the little kid gawks, at which point she destroys him. Not just destroy, but OVERKILL.
Team Dudebro(1): Finn
Not even a question. Even though they're getting to the Roadblock late, they are seasoned video game players. They might be caught off guard at first by how good the kids are, but they adapt and destroy the little fuckers. Epic win for Dudebro.
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Yeah, they're all going to be there for a while. Dudebros are definitely going to finish first, though, no matter which of them takes it.
Man, I wish Sam was still around. Not only would he be first, but I believe he would be the only one to realise from the start just how hard this one would be.
This is going to be hilarious.
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(Anonymous) 2011-07-06 03:32 am (UTC)(link)